Keys to the VIP Episode #2

Secrets to Dating Younger Women

Don’t Make These Mistakes

Yes, I know this column isn’t going to make me very popular, but if it saves you from confusion and heartache, I don’t really care. If you like younger women, if that’s your taste, I’m totally cool with that so long as she’s of legal age - just don’t make a fool out of yourself while you go about it.

You Aren’t a Stage & She isn’t Your Audience

Maybe you have had a lot of great life experiences, maybe you are an expert in your field, and yes, younger women have a way of making a lovely audience and listening and taking it all in with beautiful, bright, shiny young faces - but don’t kid yourself man, if you think it’s her jobto be your audience, and she should do all of the listening, you’ll soon find yourself with out that lovely young face gazing up at you.

Remember, we women are trained to be empathetic listeners, and young women do want to learn from older men (if they respect them). But that doesn’t give you license to make your time together the “me” show all about you.

She may pretend to pay attention when you’re together, but sooner or later she’s simply not going to return your phone calls and emails because she’s found a man who can carry on a two way conversation and take an interest in more than her body.

Which is what just happened to a professor who teaches at a local college who was dating a beautiful young friend of mine. He ignored she had a brain and was a talented writer. He ignored she was working full time, writing on the side, and going to school.

He complained about not getting to see her more when she’d been very clear about her availability. But instead of being smart about how to gain more of her interest and attention - which would be to show his interest in her as a person - not once had this man taken the time to read any of my friend’s articles, he took no interest in her work and her accomplishments.
What he focused on was himself, and wining and dining her (emphasis on the alcohol) so they could go back to his place and have sex. Which she admitted wasn’t bad, though she wasn’t sure because of all the alcohol, but certainly wasn’t enough of a reason to keep seeing him.

If You Lead With Your Resume and Income You’ll Get a Gold Digger

Dear darling successful men you are a big reason why women become gold diggers because you love to brag about your accomplishments! If you advertise you’ve got the bounty to pretty young women, pretty soon a pretty young woman will bite who’s a bounty hunter. Remember, what you say in an email counts.

But You Don’t Get to Be Cheap Because She’s Young

Another beautiful young friend of mine dated a successful older man who was so stingy that he would only ever take her to a well-known medium price range chain restaurant, always the exact same one, unless they went out with a friend or business associate of his. Trust me when I say he didn’t last long.

No, I’m not saying for a moment it has to be all white table clothes and the top listed on Zagat’s guide, but what I am saying is that don’t think that just because she’s young she just fell off the turnip truck and won’t know the difference.

Realize We Get Odd When We Spend too Much Time Alone

I’m not pointing the finger at men, both sexes get a bit strange and stuck in their ways when we spend a lot of time all on our own. For example, something fascinating I’ve learned since being single again is that just as many single men have cats, and are as dedicated to them as single women are.

Loving your pet is fine, but if you make it clear your dog Tom is number one in your life no matter what, don’t be too shocked that some lovely young woman doesn’t want to become number three.

When we live alone, and haven’t been in a serious relationship in awhile, it’s also easy to forget how odd our home, and tastes at home, could look to another person, especially of the opposite sex. Take a look around. How would your place look to a younger woman?
Are you caught in a time warp? Have you started to collect something that seems funny and innocent to you, but to a young woman might seem a bit sick, or just strange?
I know a young lady who dated an older man who had a collection of stuffed monkeys on his bed. No, she didn’t think it was cute, it weirded her out.

By Melissa BalmerCopyright © 2006, Seduction Insider

Keys to the VIP Episode #1 (4 of 4)

Simple Dating Rules that Work (4 of 4)

Another rule you should follow is don’t sleep with her until the third date. Of course, give her a passionate kiss, exactly the kind that makes her think that you’re going to have sex (or at least, make her hope that you’re going to have sex), but suddenly pull back. It’ll heighten the chemistry and fuel the flames, but it also sends the message that you respect her and aren’t just after her body. It may take a lot of will power (and a very cold shower) but believe us, when you do finally do it, you’ll be glad you waited.

Your accountant will be thankful for this dating rule: don’t spend too much. While the natural instinct is to impress her, pull out all the stops, and give this idea that you’re Mr. Millionaire, the only girls that impresses are the ones you don’t want to keep. Keep it simple, like a coffee date or an alfresco lunch, and let your personality shine. And as for the expensive gifts, save it for when you know it’s the real thing.

Keys to the VIP Episode #1 (3 of 4)

Simple Dating Rules that Work (3 of 4)

The next rule is that when you do take her out on a date, bring her to place where everyone knows you. It’s one of the easiest ways to impress her—you seem confident, popular, in-the-loop. This can be a favorite restaurant where the waiter gives you the best table in the house, or a bar where the DJ waves hello when you walk by. Every girl wants to be with a guy who has a little social clout, it’s a sign of how well you “own” your “territory”. And of course, having a good table never hurts.The next rule is that when you do take her out on a date, bring her to place where everyone knows you. It’s one of the easiest ways to impress her—you seem confident, popular, in-the-loop. This can be a favorite restaurant where the waiter gives you the best table in the house, or a bar where the DJ waves hello when you walk by. Every girl wants to be with a guy who has a little social clout, it’s a sign of how well you “own” your “territory”. And of course, having a good table never hurts.

Keys to the VIP Episode #1 (2 of 4)

Simple Dating Rules that Work (2 of 4)

Most dating veterans say to wait at least two or three days before calling her again. The point is that you want to play it cool, even if five minutes after you dropped her off at her apartment, you’re fighting the urge to drive back for another, ah, “fond farewell”. Why this number? You want to look busy enough to say that you have a life and she isn’t the center of it, but not wait too long that she thinks you aren’t interested and finds another date for Friday night.

Keys to the VIP Episode #1 (1 of 4)

Simple Dating Rules that Work (1 of 4)

Forget quantum mechanics — there is nothing more confusing and complex than the Woman. She says one thing, and means another, and just when you think you know what she wants, she’s changed her mind. But if there’s anything harder than understanding a woman, its dating her. But, here’s hope: simple rules that generally work on most women, and will help you navigate at least the first few weeks of dating.

One of the most debated rules is the “Three Day Call Back”. You’ve had a great date, a fantastic kiss, and you know that you want to ask her out again. The question is how to make her know you’re interested without a) looking desperate, or b) getting her too excited that she’ll start booking wedding venues.